Some thoughts on marriage
This afternoon I was going through my e-mail and came upon the following quote:
“The most important consequence of marriage is, that the husband and the wife become in law only one person… Upon this principle of union, almost all the other legal consequences of marriage depend. This principle, sublime and refined, deserves to be viewed and examined on every side.” –James Wilson, Of the Natural Rights of Individuals, 1792
This got my cogitation gears to turning and soon I flipped (clicked) to Genesis.
So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them. God blessed them and said to them, “Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air and over every living creature that moves on the ground.”
The man said, “This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman, ‘ for she was taken out of man.” For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.
Now, although I appreciate what James Wilson had to say in the quote above, the beauty of marriage lays in the fact that it was designed by God and instituted by Him. Laws may come and go – it is God’s design that counts in the long run. A man and woman becoming “one flesh” is what it comes down to. After 22 years of marriage I’m coming to appreciate more and more the implications of God’s design.
It has been my privilege to see many different marital customs during my life time, and to read of many more. The ceremony is different, the requirements to participate in the ceremony (either as the officiator or a participant in the marital contract) are different from place to place. Some marriage ceremonies take place in huge cathedrals. Others take place before a justice of the peace or a notary. Sometimes all that is required is a statement by the bride and the groom that they intend to form a lifetime partnership. But in the end it comes down to a man and a woman “becoming one flesh”.
Different translations of the Bible treat that statement in different ways. I’ve seen “one body”, “one person” and “one flesh” – referring to those that come readily to mind. As James Wilson noted, “This principle, sublime and refined, deserves to be viewed and examined on every side.” Today many want to subvert God’s plan. From the beginning He create humans as sexual beings, being differentiated according to their sex – “male and female created He them“. He commanded them to “be fruitful and multiply” and also that they should leave father and mother and cleave to each other. Obedience in these areas leads to a well balanced home. The man supplies certain qualities to the relationship and the woman supplies other qualities. Instead of chafing at the differences they should celebrate them and use them to advantage. Rather than bringing familial conflict from their homes of origin they should learn to live a calm and tranquil life where each one draws nearer to their Creator and thus to each other.
There are many pathologies that can be viewed in today’s world. There are thousands of ways to destroy a marriage. But God gives us a clear definition of what a marriage is – and how it should be lived out. True, Godly marriage is worth fighting for. Let us not allow our society to cheapen and destroy that which has been ordained and instituted by God.
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